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<channel>
    <title>Aaron's chunk of the web</title>
    <link>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/</link>
    <description>Catching penguins one at a time</description>
    <dc:language>en</dc:language>
    <generator>Serendipity 1.3.1 - http://www.s9y.org/</generator>
    
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        <title>RSS: Aaron's chunk of the web - Catching penguins one at a time</title>
        <link>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/</link>
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    <title>WPMU Ldap Plugin 2.6 Released!</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/352901651/285-WPMU-Ldap-Plugin-2.6-Released!.html</link>
            <category>WPMU Ldap Auth Plugin</category>
    
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    <wfw:comment>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/wfwcomment.php?cid=285</wfw:comment>

    <slash:comments>25</slash:comments>
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    <p>In conjunction with the new WPMU release and release numbering, i'm proud to announce the release of the WPMU Ldap 2.6 plugin!  This release does require WPMU 2.6 due to the utilization of some new hooks.</p><p><a href="https://sourceforge.net/project/showfiles.php?group_id=196841">Download it now!</a></p><p><b>Important Upgrade Notice!</b> - If you are upgrading from the previous 1.3 versions that did not have support for local user creation, its important that after the upgrade you login as the local administrator, and with the &quot;Fix Ldap Meta&quot; option on the plugin configuration page.  This will populate the ldap_login meta value for all accounts (except the local admin) so that existing users are able to login.</p><p>Changes:</p><ul><li>Removed ugly hacks for the retrieve password form utilizing a new filter in the trunk.</li><li>Freshened up the look of the admin pages</li></ul>As always, continue to visit the <a href="http://sourceforge.net/projects/wpmu-ldap/">SourceForge project page</a> for details, and to report bugs or add feature requests! 
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</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/352901651" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Fri, 01 Aug 2008 11:08:32 +0000</pubDate>
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<feedburner:origLink>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/285-WPMU-Ldap-Plugin-2.6-Released!.html</feedburner:origLink></item>
<item>
    <title>Wordpress Post Expirator Plugin Released</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/352710028/284-Wordpress-Post-Expirator-Plugin-Released.html</link>
            <category>WP Post Expirator</category>
    
    <comments>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/284-Wordpress-Post-Expirator-Plugin-Released.html#comments</comments>
    <wfw:comment>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/wfwcomment.php?cid=284</wfw:comment>

    <slash:comments>12</slash:comments>
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    <p>The Post Expirator plugin allows the user to set expiration dates for<br />
both posts and pages. There is a configuration option page in the<br />
plugins area that will allow you to separately control whether or not<br />
posts/pages are either deleted or changed to draft status.</p><p>The plugin hooks into the wp-cron process and runs every hour.  It was designed and developed to work with Wordpress MU, however it will not work in the mu-plugins folder due to how the plugin activation is setup to register the cron hooks.</p><p>It can be downloaded from the Wordpress Plugin Directory - <a href="http://wordpress.org/extend/plugins/post-expirator/">http://wordpress.org/extend/plugins/post-expirator/</a></p><p>Let me know if anyone encounters any issues and I hope you enjoy it!</p><p /> 
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</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/352710028" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Fri, 01 Aug 2008 08:27:15 +0000</pubDate>
    <guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/284-guid.html</guid>
    
<feedburner:origLink>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/284-Wordpress-Post-Expirator-Plugin-Released.html</feedburner:origLink></item>
<item>
    <title>WPMU Ldap Plugin 1.5.0 Released!</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/328542677/283-WPMU-Ldap-Plugin-1.5.0-Released!.html</link>
            <category>WPMU Ldap Auth Plugin</category>
    
    <comments>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/283-WPMU-Ldap-Plugin-1.5.0-Released!.html#comments</comments>
    <wfw:comment>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/wfwcomment.php?cid=283</wfw:comment>

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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    After a few weeks of testing i'm proud to announce that the official release of the Wordpress MU Ldap Plugin for the 1.5 series has been released!  You can download it on the SF project page: <a href="http://sourceforge.net/project/showfiles.php?group_id=196841">Download Now!</a><p>The Wordpress 2.5 series code changes made quiet a few changes to the authentication and cookie setting bits of the wordpress core.  These changes made alot more sense, and actually allowed me to make the plugin more stable.</p><p>Here are a few of the major changes:</p><ul><li>Remove override of wp_setcookie function - no longer needed!  This also means no more conflict with the admin ssl plugin!</li><li>Removed experimental wp_munge hooks - no longer needed!</li><li>Custom pluggable.php is no longer needed, and is totally remove from the release.</li><li>Revamps logic for local users - removed chunks of unnecessary code!</li><li>Enhanced error reporting sent back on authentication failures</li><li>Support for local users!  You can now create local users and use them as well!  Local users can be regular users or admins, it doesn't matter, they all work!</li><li>Using the new &quot;Add User&quot; screen, it's now possible to LDAP users to the blog that have never logged into WPMU.  As long as they exist in your LDAP directory, they can be added!</li></ul><p>There are also 2 mailing lists setup:</p><ul><li>wpmu-ldap-users - All SF tracker changes are posted to this list.  Please continue to post bugs and features to the SF Trackers.  On top of that, it can also be used for general discussion and hopefully more timely resolutions to problems.  <a href="https://lists.sourceforge.net/lists/listinfo/wpmu-ldap-users">Subscribe Here</a></li><li>wpmu-ldap-commits - This list is used to notify others of SVN commits.  It is setup as an announce only list.  <a href="https://lists.sourceforge.net/lists/listinfo/wpmu-ldap-commits">Subscribe Here</a></li></ul>I hope everyone enjoys the long awaited release!<br /><p><a href="http://sourceforge.net/project/showfiles.php?group_id=196841"></a></p><p><br />
</p> 
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</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/328542677" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Sun, 06 Jul 2008 08:28:55 +0000</pubDate>
    <guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/283-guid.html</guid>
    
<feedburner:origLink>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/283-WPMU-Ldap-Plugin-1.5.0-Released!.html</feedburner:origLink></item>
<item>
    <title>Twitter in Plain English</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/322402897/282-Twitter-in-Plain-English.html</link>
    
    <comments>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/282-Twitter-in-Plain-English.html#comments</comments>
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    <p>This is why everyone should use twitter!  If you don't know what it is, watch the video!</p><br />
<br />
<object height="344" width="425"><param value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ddO9idmax0o&hl=en" name="movie" /><param value="transparent" name="wmode" /><embed height="344" width="425" wmode="transparent" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ddO9idmax0o&hl=en" /></object> 
    <div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=44pQeI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=44pQeI" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=U2sbWi"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=U2sbWi" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=ccc1YI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=ccc1YI" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=nZzahI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=nZzahI" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=dnkn1I"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=dnkn1I" border="0"></img></a>
</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/322402897" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Sat, 28 Jun 2008 21:18:42 +0000</pubDate>
    <guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/282-guid.html</guid>
    
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<item>
    <title>The Quest to Conquer the PHP Session Timeout</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312178057/281-The-Quest-to-Conquer-the-PHP-Session-Timeout.html</link>
            <category>General</category>
            <category>Open Source</category>
    
    <comments>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/281-The-Quest-to-Conquer-the-PHP-Session-Timeout.html#comments</comments>
    <wfw:comment>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/wfwcomment.php?cid=281</wfw:comment>

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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    <p><br />
PHP sessions are handy little things, however it's a bit tricky to correctly get a custom timeout to work correctly.  There are a few key ini settings:<br />
</p><b>session.gc_maxlifetime</b> -This setting (in seconds) tells the PHP garbage collector how long to keep the session valid.  The default is 24 minutes.<p><b>session.gc_probability</b> - The probability that the garbage collector will run and clean up old session data.  The default value is 1.</p><p><b>session.gc_divisor</b> - The divisor to use with the probability.  The default value is 100.</p><p><b>session.save_path</b> - The path for session values to be saved.  The default is /tmp, however it is important to change this to a custom folder for the application - especially if you are in a shared hosting enviorment.  The garbage collector does not discriminate, and it will delete ANY session data that is older than the set limit, not just ones that correspond to your application.</p><p><b>session.cookie_lifetime</b> - How long to keep the cookie written to the client machine valid.  Defaults to 0, which means the cookie will expire at the end of the broswer session (at logout or when closing the broswer).</p><p>Now, before you start anything, make sure you have a writable folder setup for your application that you can use to store your session data.</p><p>Start your session with something smiliar to:</p><p>ini_set('session.gc_maxlifetime', '86400');<br />ini_set('session.gc_divisor', '1');<br />ini_set('session.gc_probability', '1');<br />ini_set('session.cookie_lifetime', '0');<br />ini_set('session.save_path', /path/to/sessions/myapp);<br />session_name('myapp');<br />session_start();</p><p>Setting the above configuration well make sure your session files are saveed in a seperate folder, they will expire in 24 hours, and the garbage collector will run everytime session_start is called to cleanup expired sessions.</p><p>The problem with alot of other infomormation is that they will suggest setting the cookie_lifetime to be the same as the gc_maxlifetime.  The problem with this is that when the cookie value is set, the expiration date is not updated as the user continues to be active in the application.  The session data on the server side is updated.  So, if this is the case, after the value of cookie_lifetime has expired, even if the session data on the server was just updated, your session will be invalid, and you will be required to login again.</p><p>I hope that this post will help someone else in the quest to conquer the php session timeout.  It definitely is not very clear, and can be very confusing!</p><p /> 
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</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/312178057" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Sat, 14 Jun 2008 20:53:00 +0000</pubDate>
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<item>
    <title>Serendipity Feedburner Sidebar Plugin Released!</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312158249/280-Serendipity-Feedburner-Sidebar-Plugin-Released!.html</link>
            <category>Open Source</category>
    
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    Over the weekend, I decided to develop a plugin for serendipity that would allow for the easy addition of the email subscription form or link into the sidebar.  As I look at feedburner more, I will most likely add more functionality into the plugin.<br />
<br />
The plugin is available in Spartacus for download!<br />
<br />
Direct download: <a href="http://spartacus.s9y.org/cvs/additional_plugins/serendipity_plugin_feedburnersidebar.zip">zip</a> 
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<a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=G3m8yI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=G3m8yI" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=FzJj1i"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=FzJj1i" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=e02geI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=e02geI" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=6UCF8I"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=6UCF8I" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=odU6JI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=odU6JI" border="0"></img></a>
</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/312158249" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Sun, 08 Jun 2008 21:48:05 +0000</pubDate>
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<item>
    <title>Htaccess Authentication Manager Released!</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312158250/279-Htaccess-Authentication-Manager-Released!.html</link>
            <category>Open Source</category>
    
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    The initial release of the Htaccess Authentication Manager (htauthman) has just been zipped up and published to SourceForge.  Everyone is encouraged to try it out and let me know if you run into any issues!  It has been heavily tested, and is already in use so it should be pretty rock solid.  It does require php 5.2, but that's about it!<br />
<br />
A special thanks to <a href="http://www.jamieoverman.com">Jamie Overman</a> for whipping up the design!<br />
<br />
SourceForge Project: <a href="http://sourceforge.net/projects/htauthman/">http://sourceforge.net/projects/htauthman/</a> 
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</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/312158250" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Sun, 08 Jun 2008 16:26:35 +0000</pubDate>
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<item>
    <title>LOST Parodies</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312158251/278-LOST-Parodies.html</link>
    
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    <h3>Lost Parady #1 - Star Wars</h3><br />
<br />
<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/EEIp0qPBbEI&hl=en"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/EEIp0qPBbEI&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object><br />
<br />
<h3>Lost Parady #2 - Pirates of the Caribbean</h3><br />
<br />
<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/TnnZk60MegQ&hl=en"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/TnnZk60MegQ&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object><br />
<br />
<h3>Lost Parady #3 - Harry Potter</h3><br />
<br />
<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/CbgECF72kLc&hl=en"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/CbgECF72kLc&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object><br />
<br />
<h3>Lost Parady #4 - Lord of the Rings</h3><br />
<br />
<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/f9CCWa2kSrY"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/f9CCWa2kSrY" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object><br />
<br />
<h3>Lost Parady #5 - Indiana Jones</h3><br />
<br />
<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/FJAoH5I-f64&hl=en"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/FJAoH5I-f64&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object> 
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</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/312158251" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Thu, 29 May 2008 18:51:58 +0000</pubDate>
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<item>
    <title>phpTek 2008 Photostream!</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312158252/277-phpTek-2008-Photostream!.html</link>
    
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    <iframe align="center" onmouseover="this.height=500" onMouseOut="this.height=80" src="http://www.flickr.com/slideShow/index.gne?group_id=&amp;user_id=&amp;set_id=&amp;tags=tek08" frameBorder="0" width="500" height="80" scrolling="no"></iframe> 
    <div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=o0QuHI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=o0QuHI" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=9Dqk1i"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=9Dqk1i" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=C0n3XI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=C0n3XI" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=tjzuYI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=tjzuYI" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?a=R7EymI"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~f/frozenpc?i=R7EymI" border="0"></img></a>
</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/312158252" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Wed, 28 May 2008 23:20:31 +0000</pubDate>
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<item>
    <title>Completely Disable UAC and Warnings in Vista</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312158253/276-Completely-Disable-UAC-and-Warnings-in-Vista.html</link>
    
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    User Access control is a pain in the ass.  It's pretty easy to turn it off, you can just use the TweakUAC app to totally disable it - <a href="http://www.tweak-uac.com/download/"><p>http://www.tweak-uac.com/download/</p></a><p>To disable the stupid security warnings, you need to do the following:</p><br />
<br />
<p>1. Use a registry editing tool to navigate to the following<br />key:</p><br />
<br />
<p><strong>2. HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Security Center</strong></p><br />
<ol><li>Add the following value:<br />
<div class="block"><div class="tableleft">Data Type:</div> <div class="tableright">DWORD</div><br />
<div class="tableleft">Value Name:</div> <div class="tableright">UACDisableNotify</div><br />
<div class="tableleft">Value:</div> <div class="tableright">1</div></div></li><li><div class="block"><div class="tableright">Restart the Security Center service for the change to take effect.</div></div></li></ol> 
    <div class="feedflare">
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</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/312158253" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Sat, 29 Mar 2008 10:59:59 +0000</pubDate>
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<item>
    <title>Brett Favre Retires</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312158254/275-Brett-Favre-Retires.html</link>
    
    <comments>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/275-Brett-Favre-Retires.html#comments</comments>
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    <p>Thanks for a great 17 seasons!</p><p></p><br />
<br />
<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/JUQLEk6QsVs"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/JUQLEk6QsVs" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object> <br /><a href="http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/275-Brett-Favre-Retires.html#extended">Continue reading "Brett Favre Retires"</a>
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    <pubDate>Fri, 07 Mar 2008 07:02:40 +0000</pubDate>
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<item>
    <title>Discovery and TLC HD coming to Madison Area!</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312158255/274-Discovery-and-TLC-HD-coming-to-Madison-Area!.html</link>
    
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    <br />
Finally!  It looks like it could be true! <a href="http://www.engadgethd.com/2008/02/27/charter-adding-tlc-hd-and-discovery-hd-to-madison-wi-lineup/">TLC &amp; Discovery HD</a><br />
 
    <div class="feedflare">
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</div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~4/312158255" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>

    <pubDate>Sun, 02 Mar 2008 22:13:10 +0000</pubDate>
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<item>
    <title>Bag O’ Crap XXIV: It's a Crapful Life</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312158256/273-Bag-O-Crap-XXIV-Its-a-Crapful-Life.html</link>
    
    <comments>http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/273-Bag-O-Crap-XXIV-Its-a-Crapful-Life.html#comments</comments>
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
    <content:encoded><![CDATA[
    <br />
<p>T’was the Night Before Christmas<br /><br />
and all through Woot Tower,<br /><br />
the staff seemed to be cross<br /><br />
and they grumbled and glowered.</p><br />
<br />
	<p>“What’s wrong, there?” called The Boss<br /><br />
from his executive suite.<br /><br />
“You better get merry<br /><br />
or you’re gonna get beat!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>“No, The Boss, we’re sorry!<br /><br />
There’s just so much stuff!<br /><br />
We’ve got six hundred mousepads<br /><br />
we have to clean up!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>“The ones with the eagle?” <br /><br />
said The Boss from on high.<br /><br />
“Maybe I’ve been too harsh<br /><br />
on you hard-working guys.” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>The Boss looked in his pocket<br /><br />
(all satin and silk)<br /><br />
and pulled out his fancy watch<br /><br />
that he had custom built.</p><br />
<br />
	<p>“It’s not yet midnight<br /><br />
in the Central Time Zone!<br /><br />
Maybe there’s still a way<br /><br />
we can get you guys home!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>“Home for Christmas?” they yelled<br /><br />
with excitable glee.<br /><br />
“Oh, our wives and our children<br /><br />
would us love to see!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>“Well let’s get right to work!” <br /><br />
said The Boss with true grit.<br /><br />
“I’ll roll up my sleeves<br /><br />
and help out with this sh-</p><br />
<br />
	<p><strong><span class="caps">NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE UPDATE</span>: SANTA <span class="caps">NOW TRACKED TO BE CLOSE TO YOUR SPECIFIC NEIGHBORHOOD</span>. ALL <span class="caps">CHILDREN SHOULD PROCEED TO BED</span>. STAY <span class="caps">TUNED FOR FURTHER UPDATES AS WARRANTED</span>.</strong></p><br />
<br />
	<p>“Oh, sir, you can’t say that!” <br /><br />
the workers explained.<br /><br />
“Naughty words on the Internet<br /><br />
make our customers faint!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>“Aw, darn it all!” said The Boss,<br /><br />
his heart full of disdain.<br /><br />
“Maybe we should just leave<br /><br />
this stuff out in the rain!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>Just then was a rustle<br /><br />
And the sound of some deer.<br /><br />
All rushed to the window<br /><br />
To see what was now here.</p><br />
<br />
	<p>“Ho ho!” came the sound<br /><br />
of a voice deep and low.<br /><br />
Then a brief pregnant pause.<br /><br />
Then finally a soft “Ho!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>“Santa!” cried the workers<br /><br />
as they ran to the sled.<br /><br />
“I want a Robosapien!” <br /><br />
“I want pistachios instead!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>“I want a Mustek camera!” <br /><br />
“A wrist radio’d be good!” <br /><br />
But Santa walked quickly to<br /><br />
where The Boss sadly stood.</p><br />
<br />
	<p>“Oh, Santa,” said The Boss,<br /><br />
“I just have too much stuff!<br /><br />
I’d get rid of it cheaply<br /><br />
But my language is too rough!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>Santa gave a big smile,<br /><br />
pulled The Boss on his lap,<br /><br />
and whispered three simple words:<br /><br />
“Stocking of Crap.” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>The Boss leaped in the air<br /><br />
as though shot from a gun<br /><br />
“Everyone to the warehouse!<br /><br />
We’ll have so much fun!” </p><br />
<br />
	<p>And they packed through the night<br /><br />
with traditional rules<br /><br />
(that I’m sure you recall<br /><br />
for you’re surely not fools).</p><br />
<br />
	<p><span class="caps">YOU</span>’LL <span class="caps">WASTE MONEY ON SHIPPING</span><br /><br />
<span class="caps">IF YOU DON</span>’T <span class="caps">ORDER THREE</span><br /><br />
<span class="caps">YOU</span>’RE <span class="caps">RESPONSIBLE FOR PICKING</span><br /><br />
<span class="caps">YOUR OWN QUANTITY</span></p><br />
<br />
	<p><span class="caps">YOU HAVE TO PICK 3</span><br /><br />
<span class="caps">AS THE AMOUNT WE WILL SEND YOU</span><br /><br />
<span class="caps">YOU</span>’LL <span class="caps">STILL GET JUST ONE BAG</span><br /><br />
<span class="caps">NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO</span></p><br />
<br />
	<p><span class="caps">BUT THE CRAP THAT</span>’S <span class="caps">INSIDE IT</span><br /><br />
<span class="caps">IS WHAT YOU</span>’RE <span class="caps">SELECTING</span><br /><br />
<span class="caps">AND YOU</span>’LL <span class="caps">WISH YOU GOT THREE</span><br /><br />
<span class="caps">IN POST</span>-PURCHASE <span class="caps">REFLECTING</span></p><br />
<br />
	<p>So make The Boss happy<br /><br />
And help us clear out our business<br /><br />
And all of us here at Woot<br /><br />
wish you guys Merry Christmas.</p><br />
		<br />
		    <p><strong><span class="caps">THE HOLY CRAP COMMANDMENTS</span> v2.0:</strong></p><br />
<p>I. Thou shalt expect nothing beyond one bag of some kind and your chosen quantity of crappy items (which should be <span class="caps">THREE</span>).</p><br />
<p>II. Thou shalt not whine and complain when some people’s crap turns out to be nicer than yours.</p><br />
<p><span class="caps">III</span>. Thou shalt take a moment to consider whether you might be better off just not buying this crap.</p><br />
<p>IV. Thou shalt not order just one crap and blame it on anything but your own inattention.</p><br />
<p>V. To paraphrase Stephen Stills, shalt thou not get the crap you want, want the crap you get.</p><br />
 
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    <pubDate>Tue, 25 Dec 2007 09:35:47 +0000</pubDate>
    <guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.frozenpc.net/s9y/archives/273-guid.html</guid>
    <category>christmas</category>
<category>random crap</category>
<category>woot</category>

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<item>
    <title>LOST Seasion 4 Teasers!</title>
    <link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/frozenpc/~3/312158257/272-LOST-Seasion-4-Teasers!.html</link>
    
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
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    <pubDate>Sat, 22 Dec 2007 00:14:43 +0000</pubDate>
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    <category>lost!</category>
<category>season 4</category>
<category>teaser</category>

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    <title>A must see PC vs Mac Spoof</title>
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    <author>nospam@example.com (Aaron Axelsen)</author>
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    <pubDate>Thu, 22 Nov 2007 17:08:54 +0000</pubDate>
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